The Tories are mild-mannered politicians turned into the Pound-Shop Stasi who rule our lives

DURING the long, strange years of the Covid pandemic, a virus has wormed its way into the bloodstream of our politicians – and they are still not free of it.

An arrogant belief that our better ones know best.

The Conservative Party is still the Pfund-Lager Stasi that rules our lives


The Conservative Party is still the Pfund-Lager Stasi that rules our livesPhoto credit: AFP

An institutionalized bossiness.

A business, statist, certainty that our elected politicians are not simply there to run our country. But to live our lives.

The pandemic is over everywhere in the world except Xi Jinping’s China, where millions are currently in lockdown, three years after Covid roared out of Wuhan like bat soup from hell.

But one of the worst side effects of Covid is still raging in our own country.

The pandemic has turned humble, mild-mannered politicians into pound-laden Stasi.

“Everyone will have to take responsibility for the energy they use and . . . have to think about how they want to reduce their energy consumption,” Jeremy Hunt warned MPs.

Where does it come from – this pushy, self-important tone?

That instinctive domination?

It comes from the unbridled, unbridled power politicians enjoyed during Covid.

It got them all drunk on their own smugness.

In a country not at war, no politician has ever had as much control over every aspect of our lives as they did during Covid.

For the first time in our history, you were given strict rules about where you could go, who you could see, and whether the government would allow you to hug a loved one on their deathbed.

Lockdown loopy fanatics in Westminster

We followed their draconian – often arbitrary and crazy – rules for the greater good.

But only now are we seeing the terrible damage done to our way of life.

And the mindset of our managers.

When Jeremy Hunt sniffs that our people “have to change their behavior” if we are to tackle the energy crisis, you sense the lockdown loopy fanatics in Westminster tend to miss Covid.

But we don’t need Jeremy tut-tutting if we’d rather turn up the heat than wear a wool sweater.

Maybe it’s the government that needs to change THEIR behavior.

Perhaps the conservative route would be to figure out how the populace of one of the wealthiest countries in the world can take a hot bath whenever they feel like it.

Build some nuclear power plants. Choose the green crap. That kind of thing.

Matt Hancock, Health Secretary during much of Covid, has been wagging a squeamish finger throughout the pandemic and openly rejoicing in a law that would get you 10 years in prison – longer than the average sentence for rape – if you lie about a quarantine to escape.

Hancock has long since gone to feast on koala testicles, but the Stasi bargain bin remains.

But it’s not Hunt’s job to make you wear thermals instead of turning up the heat.

There will be reckoning for the pandemic one day.

Those who come out best will emphatically not be the ones who endlessly cried out for longer, harder lockdowns — the imperious boots who LOVED choosing how you were allowed to mourn your dying mother.

There’s nothing remotely conservative about this constant urge to tell you how to live your life.

But post Covid, our politicians are convinced that the big state knows best.

They’ve become hopelessly addicted to teaching you how to live our lives.

And forget that this is still a free country.

Survivor Wilko struck a nerve

The day before the operation that he expected would kill him, I had afternoon tea with Wilko Johnson. It was April 2014.

With former guitar legend Dr. Feelgood had been diagnosed with end-stage pancreatic cancer a year earlier.

The former dr. Feelgood guitar legend Wilko Johnson


The former dr. Feelgood guitar legend Wilko JohnsonPhoto credit: Getty
Sonnenmann Tony Parsons with Wilko before his cancer operation


Sonnenmann Tony Parsons with Wilko before his cancer operation

He had a 3 kg malignant tumor in his stomach, bigger than a basketball.

And it should have killed him long before we had tea.

But it didn’t kill Wilko.

Nor did the major surgery he had to perform in the operating room at Addenbrooke’s Hospital in Cambridge to remove it.

After being told he would 100 percent die in 2013, Wilko survived.

He beat all odds and died this week at the age of 75.

And though Wilko’s death came more than a decade later than expected, it’s still a cause of national mourning.

Because Wilko Johnson was up there with Jimmy Page, Keith Richards, Pete Townshend – the very best British guitarists.

if dr When Feelgood’s lead singer Lee Brilleaux took a break from singing, Wilko began one of his mad runs across the stage, eyes bulging insanely, leveling his black and red Fender Telecaster at the audience like a machine gun and hacking out angry riffs that rattled the rafters.

It was possibly the most exciting sight in all of rock ‘n’ roll.

Personally, Wilko was the polar opposite of his berserker stage persona.

He was thoughtful, polite, soft-spoken, and gently humorous.

His cancer diagnosis changed him profoundly.

Always intellectually curious, the certainty of death made him love life with an overwhelming, all-consuming intensity.

Wilko could cry at the sight of the sunlight.

As we drank our tea, fans banged against the windows of the hotel we were sitting in.

Ironically, they were all excited to see the man who played Ser Ilyn Payne, the dumb executioner on Game Of Thrones who was hired for his psychotic stage staring.

But music maniacs like me will remember the young gunslinger with the Telecaster.

Farewell, dear Wilko, my friend and my hero.

You were one of the greats.

Bottom of the crown

MARCIA WARREN, 78, plays the Queen Mother in The Crown.

And you know the way you can’t really tell the difference between Elizabeth Debicki and the real Princess Diana?

Marcia Warren as Queen Mum, pictured with Imelda Staunton as Queen and Jonathan Pryce as Prince Philip


Marcia Warren as Queen Mum, pictured with Imelda Staunton as Queen and Jonathan Pryce as Prince PhilipPhoto credit: NETFLIX

With Marcia and the Queen Mum it’s the other way around.

It took me most of The Crown’s fifth series to figure out who Marcia was supposed to be.

I thought she was playing some old girl who had wandered into Buckingham Palace from a nearby bus stop.

“I look older on screen than the Queen Mother ever has,” admits Marcia.

And also – nothing like them.

I know The Crown distorts real life, but this is ridiculous.

INCREDIBLE, Britain still sends £51.7million a year in foreign aid to China.

Um – shouldn’t China be paying us reparations for Covid?

Demos with balls

THE calls to grant asylum to the Iranian football team are well intentioned but naive.

They all have loved ones in Iran.

Asylum would mean moving away from everyone they love.

They sang their national anthem against Wales.

In the last game against the USA they were silent.

And with any hint of defying their country’s brutal rulers, they risk death, torture and imprisonment

These Iranian footballers are what true bravery looks like.

OUR monarchs will be kings for the rest of our lives. King Charles III Then King William V. Then King George VII.

But have you seen Kate beaming at the king’s first state banquet?

No one does more to secure the monarchy than this Princess of Wales.

Hamza is the Mane Man…

UKRAINIAN model Alena Kravchenko and twin daughters Valeria and Miroslava are real Rapunzels with hair that hangs down to their gold-plated slippers.

Impressive. But Hamza Yassin, Strictly’s clear favourite, has hair almost as long.

Alena Kravchenko and twin daughters Valeria and Miroslava are real Rapunzels


Alena Kravchenko and twin daughters Valeria and Miroslava are real RapunzelsCredit: mdwfeatures/Alena Kravchenko
Hamza Yassin and Jowita Przystal from Strictly Come Dancing


Hamza Yassin and Jowita Przystal from Strictly Come DancingCredit: PA

And Hamza can do Salsa, Quickstep and American Smooth without a Rapunzel hair slipping. The Tories are mild-mannered politicians turned into the Pound-Shop Stasi who rule our lives


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