The next Conservative leader has to keep all the big promises, love this country and be a real Tory

THE stakes could hardly be higher. . . for the party that won the 2019 parliamentary elections, for our democracy and for our country itself.

After Boris, the Tory party has a choice – to press the reset button or the one marked self-destruct.

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Despite Sir Keir Starmer being acquitted by Durham Police for drinking beer and eating curries during lockdown, there is not much appetite for a Labor majority government led by a north London barrister.

But if the Tories choose the wrong leader – or continue to make the same mistakes that led to Boris Johnson’s ouster – then Starmer will scrape the finish line at the head of a coalition of chaos.

Labor apparatchiks who still light a candle for Comrade Corbyn.

Lib Dems who long for proportional representation and an endless Narnia of coalition governments.

And English-loathing Scottish nationalists who want nothing less than the dismemberment of the UK itself.

The Conservative Party parliamentary group just ousted Boris in a very British coup.

You better make sure it was worth it anyway.

And they will do that by keeping their promises.

It is true that Boris Johnson has reached sections of the working class that no other politician will ever reach.

But ultimately he won that impressive 80-seat majority not because people liked him, but because they liked what he stood for.

The conservative manifesto of 2019 now reads like the biggest package of lies in history.

Support workers and families! Strengthen Union! End Brexit and Unleash Britain’s Potential! Control immigration! Tougher penalties for criminals!

And my favourite: we will not increase income tax, VAT or social security!

How does that go?

Keeping your word should be as important in politics as it is in life.

Manifesto promises should not be so casually, willfully – almost comically – broken.

In December 2019 – just a thousand days ago – 14 million people voted for the Conservative Party, many for the first time ever.

The next Tory leader needs to start delivering all the big talk that won 14m votes.

Boris is in the dustbin of history because Tory MPs wanted him gone.

Yes, they were cheered on by the gloriously impartial BBC, ITN and Sky, as well as the rancid Remainer butt who will never forgive him for freeing us from Brussels.

ECONOMIC PARALYSIS

But make no mistake, it was his fellow Tories who wielded the long knives.

Now they are bound to find someone better.

And it doesn’t matter if they voted “Leave or Remain” in 2016.

All that matters is that they keep the promises made in this manifesto.

Because losing Boris is a big gamble – and if he becomes the insipid Starmer PM, it could lead to economic paralysis, the silent annihilation of Brexit and the dismantling of our country.

That impressive 80-seat majority came about because Boris Johnson treated ordinary citizens with a degree of respect they no longer receive from the Labor Party.

It would be the bitterest of ironies if his departure resulted in a minority Labor government that abhors the working class.

For their patriotism. Leave for voting. For far preferring a chuckling toff from Eton and Oxford to Comrade Corbyn and his far-left platitudes. Look – Boris disappointed me too.

I mean, Boris really let me down. He made me feel that Brexit wasn’t worth all the poison, the social division, the wasted energy, time and money.

He made me regret Brexit and as much as I love the old chubby, chubby rascal I will never forgive him for that.

We can all understand how Boris came to collect his P45. Too much frills. Too many cocks. Too many dirty little affairs like the last one involving Chris “Arse” Pincher, allegedly drunk men in a private club.

Too many times when Boris looked like he’d had his beak dragged for six of the best.

SIX OF THE BEST

And fatally, Boris inspires tactical votes that will see the Tories lose seats to Labor in the north and Lib Dems in the south.

So, plenty of reasons for Boris to be away.

But let’s face it, it has something to do with democracy.

Much of the reason these grotesque non-entities in the Labor Party are celebrating as if it were VE Day is because they suspect they would – even now – never have beaten Boris Johnson in a general election.

And maybe, aside from the sadness of seeing him walk offstage, a part of you is glad to see him gone.

Because you couldn’t hold your parents’ dying hand during lockdown while they boozed like Led Zeppelin roadies in the rose garden at 10 Downing Street.

Or because you’re appalled that Boris often didn’t look like a Tory prime minister at all, continued his socialist policies at great expense and brazenly broke the promises he made when he wanted your vote for Brexit in 2016.

It still puzzles me that he never cut EU energy taxes as solemnly promised.

If the Tories have any future, they must begin to deliver on their Manifesto promises.

I suspect Brits will always have a soft spot for Boris Johnson.

But there were too many times when the old rake treated the Brits like a dimwitted, big-breasted mistress who doesn’t understand why her lover has to spend Christmas Day with his wife and children.

promise her everything

WEAK & NOT POPULAR

Starmer is a weak, unpopular leader.

But if Labor has the wit of finding someone with passion, charisma and possibly a Nordic accent – I’m thinking Andy Burnham or Gary Neville – then the Conservative Party will be left out of history’s dust collectors.

People didn’t kick Boris Johnson out. Maybe they would have. Now we’ll never know.

His greatest hits are as familiar as a Rolling Stones setlist.

Complete Brexit – three little words that hide the hideous political paralysis it has freed us from.

Destroying Comrade Corbyn and saving this country from a self-loathing, insane left-wing government.

This world’s best vaccine launch that saved us when Starmer’s lab would have locked us up forever.

And supporting Ukraine as it suffered the murderous aggression of a nuclear-armed madman and the cowards in Washington and Paris and Berlin and Brussels trembled with fear.

But the regicide is now done. And what matters is not Boris Johnson’s career, nor the elected government he led, nor even the manner in which he passed away.

What matters is that our nation stands at a crossroads that will determine our future and generations to come.

There’s a growing theory that Boris was the Meghan Markle of British politics – he figured he could wing it with charisma, fame and a smile and skip all the boring stuff about the service.

That was his fatal mistake. He will always be liked by millions. But the Boris cult can be exaggerated.

FATAL ERROR

14 million people didn’t vote for the Tories in 2019 because Boris made them laugh.

They voted for the Conservatives – many of them in working-class northern constituencies that had always been Labor – because they believed Tory politics would be good for them and the people they care about.

It’s not even remotely complicated. The British are a conservative people, deep in their blood and bones.

In 2019, an overwhelming majority of them liked the promise of a truly conservative government that would promote prosperity, take pride in our national identity, and make us a sovereign nation again.

You didn’t get it. And now it’s time for Rishi or Liz or Penny or whoever to deliver.

And if they don’t, we can be sure that Starmer will stumble into 10 Downing Street in 2024, with Nicola Sturgeon propping him up.

I don’t think Keir Starmer is a bad man. But he is fatally weak and willing to stoop miserably low in the interest of seizing power.

He’s tried to get Comrade Corbyn to the election – twice – and if he can crouch for Jezza, he can crouch for Sturgeon and their English-loathing Scottish nats.

And if you think nothing is working now, wait for the Coalition of Chaos to start organizing our lives. It’s now one minute to midnight.

For better or for worse, Boris is gone. And if it feels like a lazy day for democracy, what lies ahead could be even worse.

The party elected in 2019 now has the future of this country in its hands like never before.

The next Tory leader doesn’t have to be the charismatic, joking life and soul of the party that Have I Got News For You can host.

But they have to keep all the big promises. And they must love this country.

And they must be a real Tory.

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