Forget a watered down monarchy, we need the full royal family

I was teased on Thursday. I walked through a park frequented by the local posho near Cambridge University.

“F*** the queen. Fuck the royal family,” one of the spotty gremlins yelled at me (in an unmistakably middle-class voice) as he and his buddies boozed on the lawn.

The royal family is a huge asset to Britain and doesn't need to be slimmed down


The royal family is a huge asset to Britain and doesn’t need to be slimmed downCredit: John Rainford
I heard young students swear because I wore a Union Jack dress


I heard young students swear because I wore a Union Jack dressCredit: DELIVERED

I knew this was addressed to me because I had come disguised as a walking, talking Union Jack to meet a friend.

My seamstress from a mother had me made a custom Union Flag dress especially for the anniversary – and I looked unashamedly like a posh tribute to Geri Halliwell at the 1997 Brit Awards.

I’ll admit my instinct was to call back and ask the snotty jerk why he felt the need to overcompensate for his small manhood by mocking a 96-year-old lady.

But a barely post-adolescent student didn’t want to ruin my anniversary spirit.

However, there is one thing that really bothered me about that brief encounter – the idea that proud “anti-royalist” is somehow seen by large swathes of the youth as a badge to wear with pride.

Last but not least, young people who are said to be the best and brightest among us.

How aides organized the anniversary service'to avoid a clash between Harry and Wills'
Harry and Meghan left St Paul's sharply to avoid

According to YouGov, the number of young people aged 18 to 24 who believe the monarchy is good for Britain has fallen sharply over the past decade. In 2012, at least 60 percent thought so.

Ten years later, hardly a quarter thinks like that. This contrasts with seven out of ten people over the age of 50. And that’s tragic.

Those of us who, like me, have a deep affinity for Queen and Country are increasingly being portrayed as elitist dinosaurs fighting for a dying institution by bright-eyed, hypocritical do-gooders.

And what’s worse, we seem to take it in our chin that the beginning of the end of the monarchy is near.

If I was paid a pound for every time I heard experts talk about the inevitability of a “slimmed down” monarchy over the past few weeks, I might be as rich as the Queen herself.

Prince Charles is rumored to be supporting the reduction of the 1,200-year-old institution. But the social argument is not compelling and the economic argument is non-existent.

Especially given that the royal family only costs each taxpayer a few pounds a year.

Haven’t seen such value for money since buying pick ‘n’ mix at Woolworths as a kid.

Pushing back the royals is a suicide squad. There is no such thing as a “slimmed down” monarchy. There is a monarchy that is relevant and a monarchy that is completely irrelevant.

The idea that a reduced-fat, sugar-free monarchy could have a long-term impact is something for the birds.

Such a constellation would quickly and surely disappear into global insignificance. Support for the Commonwealth countries, which make up a third of the world’s population, would quickly fall like dominoes.

Britain’s smug metropolitan anti-royalists would begin to successfully spread the gospel that the monarch is an oppressive symbol of white supremacy and encourage republican outbursts in places with close cultural ties to Britain.

That can’t do anyone any good. And this from someone who hails from a former British colony and knows the uncomfortable history of British imperial rule.

But if the reign of Queen Elizabeth II has taught us anything, it is SURE that a strong, devoted monarchy can and does belong in a modern world.

It can unite all corners of the nation and the world, exert a significant moral influence, and raise morale immeasurably.

I don’t want a “slimmed-down”, half-in, half-out, squishy royal family when the Queen passes the baton.

I want to see a bold, emboldened and even more devoted monarchy.

Boos for Boris

There was tumbleweed when Sir Keir Starmer showed up at St Paul's


There was tumbleweed when Sir Keir Starmer showed up at St Paul’sCredit: AP

BORIS JOHNSON has so far had little reason to envy Labor leader Sir Keir Starmer.

The prime minister had spent his political life being the lovable, charismatic and proven electoral winner – a womanizer who, until recently, enjoyed an almost rock-star popularity.

Starmer, on the other hand, was the Corbyn rebound candidate who wouldn’t even stand out in a series of magnolia walls. That’s until yesterday.

On his way to the Jubilee service at St Paul’s, Sir Keir was unsurprisingly greeted by the public with echoes of tumbleweed and yawns from onlookers.

However, the Prime Minister and his wife were met with loud boos from the crowd.

Conservative MPs who have refrained from delivering letters of no confidence to the Prime Minister have rightly sweated after this very revealing reception.

I’d be amazed if anyone ever uttered the words, “What I would give to be Sir Keir Starmer for the day.”

But yesterday, for the humiliated PM, it might have been that day.

Shades in the line of fire

Rainbow balls promote US Marines Pride Month


Rainbow balls promote US Marines Pride MonthCredit: social

IT’S Pride Month – 30 days dedicated to celebrating LGBTQ+ people. Cue the corporate virtue signalling.

Who can forget when every man and his dog changed their profile picture to a black square in solidarity with Black Lives Matter?

It caused immeasurable change – literally immeasurable because it meant exactly nothing.

Well, every June is the annual LGBTQ+ Cringe Fest, where corporatist giants paint their logos rainbow colors.

It’s meant to show “alliance” with the LGBTQ+ community, but it’s just a reminder to the rest of us that we’re surrounded by virtuous leaders beholden to gender-obsessed ideologues.

But my personal favorite this year is the US Marines. In celebration of Pride Month, what is said to be the world’s toughest fighting force uploaded a picture of rainbow-colored balls.

I’m sure it would bring great comfort to all victims to know that at least they were executed with LGBTQ+ friendly bullets and not the usual homophobic, transphobic manner.

Isle fans want hot girls and handsome guys – not guards

No one tunes in to Love Island to see boxes ticked


No one tunes in to Love Island to see boxes tickedPhoto credit: ITV

PARTICIPANTS of the new Love Island series will take part in a “diversity and inclusion training” before the start of the show.

Show bosses have hired advisors to teach contestants things like “inclusive language,” “safe spaces,” and “microaggressions.”

This comes as the new show is being hailed as “the most diverse ever”, featuring a deaf islander and more ethnic minorities on the programme.

What an insincere Taurus. The whole show is based around a very EX-exclusive group of unnaturally attractive people with wild EX-exclusive dating preferences spending the summer in what might be the world’s most EX-exclusive holiday villa.

People don’t tune in by the millions to Love Island to watch a bunch of social justice activists having in-depth conversations about unconscious bias, lived experience and white privilege.

They tune in to watch steroid pumped oafs and botox filled chicks shamelessly snogging and romping.

The show’s signature format sees the least desirable contestants being callously kicked off the show when no one wants to pair with them — like the fat kid last picked by his peers in a gym class.

A Worker Love Island is nothing but insincere box-ticking. Forget a watered down monarchy, we need the full royal family


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