England manager Gareth Southgate is a nice guy – too bad he’s not good at football

I haven’t recovered from England’s defeat by France YET.

It really hurts I mean my foot.

Gareth Southgate is desperately missing as football manager


Gareth Southgate is desperately missing as football managerPhoto credit: Getty

When Harry Kane sent that penalty across the Persian Gulf and knocked a guy off a chair in Bandar Abbas, Iran, I tried to kick the dog but just hit the table instead.

made midfoot.

The result? Well, I could have told you the result before the game – and how it would all play out.

Then a few days later I wake up and realize the public wants Gareth Southgate to continue as England manager.

For real. I’m like WTF? Are you out of your tiny minds?

Southgate may be a nice man who dresses well.

He may be a decent man. But he misses it a lot as a football manager.

Take Saturday’s somber game.

We weren’t unlucky. We didn’t have enough shots on target to be considered unlucky.

As always, Gareth started the team to “contain” France instead of attacking them.

So we didn’t create any chances in the first half.

When the brilliant Bukayo Saka wreaked havoc, there was no one who could wipe out the odds.

The French penalty area was empty of English attackers.

Why play like that when we have a strong defense and KNOW the French have a strong defense?

Attack is surely the best option?

Not for Gareth. We attack a bit when we’re a goal behind.

But create as few chances in the penalty area by being careful.

We get a penalty. Then it was time to get some fresh legs and really punish the French who were looking.

The big plus for the England team was our strength at depth on the bench.

Gareth did nothing until the French took the lead again.

What does he do then, our manager? He takes Saka, our best player.

Gareth did nothing

You could hear the French breathe a sigh of relief.

Meanwhile, still no one comes into the box.

He waits until the 98th minute to bring Jack Grealish. Why?

Throughout the game, Kyle Walker did an excellent job on Kylian Mbappe.

But Southgate failed to notice that Ousmane Dembele was causing all sorts of problems for Luke Shaw.

Nothing has been done to fix the problem.

And that’s how we ended up losing. Not because our players weren’t good enough. Or that France was brilliant.

Because the game was once again poorly managed.

Just as Gareth mismanaged the EURO final against Italy and waited far too long to make the right changes.

Another game we could and should have won.

Just as he badly managed the World Cup semifinals against Croatia and the Nations League semifinals against the Netherlands.

The same mistakes over and over again.

I admit Southgate got us to the final. And that he brought a certain togetherness to the team.

He’s a good man manager. But a lousy football manager.

Under Gareth, the best talent England has ever had has won precisely nothing.

And seen the side relegated from the Nations League after their worst results in 60 years.

The truth has always been that when England play a decent team with a decent manager, we lose.

If you want it to stay that way, then stick with Gareth.

But don’t kick the dog if we lose a crucial game.

Instead, step into yourself.

Evil habit of winning

YES, yes, Lionel Messi is a wonderful footballer.

Probably the largest in the known universe.

The Argentinian players are delighted with their quarter-final win against the Netherlands last week


The Argentinian players are delighted with their quarter-final win against the Netherlands last weekPhoto credit: Rex

But what about the rest of the Argentina team?

A bunch of unreconstituted thugs. Bad sport and snarling cheats.

“Animals” were what our world champion manager, Sir Alf Ramsey, called them in 1966.

And today’s Argie site isn’t that different.

But maybe a little malice separates a World Cup team from followers like England.

Sober brand boring

RUSSELL BRAND is proud to announce he’s been sober for two decades.

Well done buddy.

Russell Brand has been sober for two decades


Russell Brand has been sober for two decadesPhoto credit: Getty

But if you think back about 20 years, wasn’t Russell Brand the most famous comedian in the country?

They even had him on Newsnight lecturing on things in a rather weird way.

And have you heard from him at all in about a decade?

I hate to say this, Russell.

But I think the public liked you better when you were totally out of your box.

Enough is enough

IS presenter Kate Garraway fed up with Martin Lewis?

The body language on Good Morning Britain would suggest so.

GMB's Kate Garraway looks like she's had enough of Martin Lewis


GMB’s Kate Garraway looks like she’s had enough of Martin LewisPhoto credit: Rex

Lewis has advertised himself as the only person in the country who understands business.

The Volkschampion etc. I find him about as personable as a adder with ADHD.

If my guess is correct, it’s nice that the excellent Garraway is doing something similar.

Sorry is rock solid

ARCHEOLOGISTS are delighted to have found a 10,000-year-old rock carving of a man with his hand wrapped tightly around his mouth.

And a slightly glassy expression.

He has to protect his sensitive parts from wild animals, according to the experts.

Have to say it doesn’t look like that to me.

But it’s exactly the apology I’ll give the police if I’m caught in a similar pose on Stanhope’s main street in the future.

“I was afraid there might be leopards around, officer.”

Increase pay to reset

It is sheer spite for rail unions to have so many strikes over Christmas.

And that commie-dimbo Mick Lynch should understand that his workers will lose a lot of public support as a result.

Militant union boss Mick Lynch leads a picket line


Militant union leader Mick Lynch leads a picket lineCredit: PA

And now the nurses and ambulance drivers are also on strike.

It’s starting to feel like that terribly cold winter of 1978 – when even the gravediggers went on strike.

And under a Labor government.

Here is my theory why it happens.

Capitalism needs a fresh start about every 40 or 50 years.

Wages are too low and workers rightly feel they are not getting their fare share.

It’s happening now, it happened in 1978, and it happened in 1926.

It’s all a matter of balance – and right now we’ve got the balance wrong.

Inflation is of course a problem.

But it’s not as big a problem as a low-wage economy.

The government should tell the NHS and rail companies to settle for a decent increase.

Can’t change science

I see that the last people who don’t understand the meaning of the word “woman” are the people who put together the Cambridge Dictionary.

They have expanded the definition to include people who are not women but are actually men.

The Cambridge Dictionary has expanded the definition of women to include people who are not women


The Cambridge Dictionary has expanded the definition of women to include people who are not women

However, it doesn’t matter how much you tinker with the language.

You can’t change science.

The chromosomes – and often the beard – tend to tell the truth.

A SNOWFLAKE is something unique and wonderful.

Missing toddler's mother faces 19 charges including murder after shock arrest
Rapper Gunna is released from prison after pleading guilty to racketeering

Did you know that when a single snowflake falls on London, nine million other snowflakes panic with worry and the whole city comes to a standstill?

Unbelievable, isn’t it?

https://www.the-sun.com/news/6918978/england-manager-gareth-southgate-nice-bloke-useless-football/ England manager Gareth Southgate is a nice guy – too bad he’s not good at football


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